Every week I choose a new oracle/tarot deck to connect with throughout the week during my morning meditation. This past week’s deck was called 6th Sense Connection Oracle Deck. More often than not I chose a different card each day, however this week, it just so happened that one specific card literally fell out of the deck for me 3 times! The cards message was this:
With this last full Moon, this cards timing is impecable. Over the last 13 years, I have been doing A LOT of self work. I have been digging into the dark corners that I no one wants to look at, I've been bringing situations to the surface that I had chosen to ignore and repress and sorting through them to find the lessons, embrace the lessons and to learn from the lessons. It's been a ride, however the lessons learnt have always been worth it.
As much as I continue to do the work, I still encounter triggers, whether it be situations, environments or people. This morning while scrolling social media, I was triggered by a post. A post that was sharing how wonderful their weekend was surrounded by "my family" and then proceeded to share talk about their family. The triggering part was that they left some people out, in their sharing of their amazing family weekend. Some people who are always there when needed, who have always shown support regardless of differing views and beliefs and my heart hurt for them, because I knew that they would see the post and notice that they were not included in the joyous shout out to the world about their weekend.
So I sat with this, and moved through the emotions of being fucking pissed off that someone could be so self involved. Anger came up, frustration, sadness, compassion...and I'm sure a few more emotions.
Where I landed was, this is not my shit, although I am obviously holding some sort of judgement. We cannot control others actions. Everything happens for our highest good. Things happen for us, not to us. And we get to choose who we want in our lives. We get to choose who gets our time and energy. Another awareness was that as hard as it is to watch others journey's through this lifetime, it is their journey, one they chose and not one for me to interfere in or judge.
Another awareness was that everyone is looking for connection right now. Yearning for community and support. Wanting to connect with like minded people, wanting to be seen, valued and needed. As human beings, we all need this and deserve this. We all need to receive love, compassion and understanding from others. Most importantly I feel that we all need to be seen for who we truly are. Not who someone else wants us to be, or society thinks we should be, but for our true authentic selves.
So why did I personally find this so triggering, even though it was my heart hurting for someone else who didn't get mentioned or more so acknowledged for all the energy they put out?
What came to me after sitting with my emotions, was that I too am yearning for a community of like minded individuals. So to see someone not be seen or acknowledged for their efforts and contributions, and to not be included, resonated with me. But it also brought about the reminder that we can't be looking for external validation from others. We can't do things because we think we are supposed to, we have to do them because we truly want to in our heart, and outside of that, we don't need anything else.
Since closing Local Organics Health Food & Wellness Centre, my interactions with people who are looking to improve their lives through mind, body and spirit has been lacking. I also have been going inward on my journey and haven't had the energy to put outside of myself this last year.
That being said, the desire to share, collaborate and initiate others is returning and it feels good. I am looking forward to connecting with more like minded individuals, who are striving for more growth, awareness and to over all just level up in mind, body and spirit.
"I am happy and attract good health, wealth and prosperity." - Who's with me?!
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